News of Family Interest

Tameka Shaw: Please consider airing my story.
December 10, 2007

My name is Tameka Shaw and I reside in Tulsa, OK. I am a single parent of five beautiful children whose ages range from eighteen months to thirteen years. 

You see, the Department of Human Service, Child Welfare division, has removed my children from my care for the fourth time and I feel that it is unjust. Why do I feel this way, you ask? There must have been a reason for them to remove your children you say? Well there wasn’t. I pray that you listen to my story with an open mind and heart and I hope that you will help me in my quest to make my story known so that changes can be made in this faulty system we have. 

I have tried contacting my local media (newspapers and television) and all I hear is that they cannot touch this story.

I’ve contacted Attorneys in my State to see if they would even take my case to file a lawsuit and they also turned me away! 

I want you to understand that I am a VERY good mother. I don’t deny the fact that I still have a lot to learn, but I am trying the best I know how. 

With that being said, please listen to my story…

In November of 2005, my children were removed from my care because my now ex-boyfriend spanked my eldest son for stealing and left bruises on his legs and arms. He went to school complaining that his leg hurt. He was sent to the nurse and in turn, the Vice Principal called Child Welfare. They removed my children (at the time, I only had four, I found out shortly thereafter that I was pregnant with the fifth child) from my home for failure to protect on my part. They did NOT file any charges against my Ex. My children stayed with my Aunt and Uncle while I completed the parenting classes. After six months, my kids were returned home under a trial reunification. That was supposed to last six months as well.

Four weeks before my case was to close, I get a call from the worker who was taking over for my original case worker who was out due to a stroke. She stated that my eldest son’s school called her and informed her that my son was suicidal because he drew some pictures that were inappropriate. His class was studying the Dark ages and he drew a picture of a witch burning at the stake. Based on that drawing, his teacher thought he was suicidal. The worker (Jo Lowe ) called me and stated that she thought he may need to be evaluated but would run it by her supervisor and let me know. I didn’t hear from her again. 

About a week later, while at work, I get a call from my daycare provider who states my son didn’t get off the bus after school and wondered was everything ok. I was frantic, because he went to school and I didn’t pick him early. Something told me to call the case worker to see if she knew anything. She stated that she had picked him up from school and took him to be evaluated at a local behavioral hospital. 

She then told me that she had him admitted. 

I asked her why would she do such a thing without talking to me first. She simply said that she didn’t have to tell me anything, that since my case was open she had the right to take him from school and have him evaluated. 

That happened on a Friday. The following Sunday, I received a call from a therapist at the hospital. He asked me what my son was there for and I advised him that I didn’t know; that I didn’t put him there. He stated that I would need to come in that Monday so we could discuss my sons’ placement there. 

When I got there, the therapist tells me that he feels nothing is wrong with my son and that I can take him home. He stated that normally what he would have to do is get DHS (child welfare) permission to release him to me since they are the ones who actually put him there. He said he had made reasonable efforts to contact the worker, but she failed to respond, so he sent her a fax stating that he released my son in my care. Again, the therapists stated that there was nothing wrong with my son, nothing indicated that he was suicidal or had any type of behavioral issues.

Four hours after my son was released, I left him at home with my now three month old son , who was sleeping in my room (my son was trained in infant CPR and was twelve years old at the time) to pick my two daughters up from school which was just two blocks away. My baby was a preemie and it was cold that day and the heat in my minivan was not working properly, so I left him at home with my son. 

State guidelines indicate that children, grades six or older, can watch younger siblings for a short amount of time. I was gone for forty-five minutes! 

My son told me later that DHS pulled up to my house right after I left to pick up my girls from school. He stated that they sat in front of my house and shortly thereafter, Tulsa police showed up. They demanded that he open the door and searched my house. They woke up the baby with all the noise they were making and he began to cry. My son also stated they took my baby without any clothes and put him into the DHS worker's car. 

When I got home, there were four police cars in the cul-de-sac that I lived on. I left my girls in the car and ran up to my house. I heard the worker ask the police officer did he find anything, was anybody else there and the officer replied that he didn’t find anything. She told him, “well, we are taking them anyway.” I turned to see officers removing my daughters from my car and at the same time my seven year old son was getting off the bus. As soon as the doors opened, an officer whisked him from the bus and into a police car. 

I asked the DHS worker what this was about and she told me that I had left all of my children with my son who was mentally retarded. My son is NOT by any means, mentally retarded and never has been diagnosed as such. When I tried to explain this to the worker, she refused to listen and took my children. 

Two days later, we went to court for a preliminary hearing to determine if the removal was just. The matter of my son being ‘mentally retarded’ wasn’t even brought up. They stated that they were informed that my Ex was supposedly in my home at the time and when DHS and the police showed up, he ran out the back door and jumped my six foot privacy fence. Just so you know, my ex was over three hundred pounds and stood six feet even. There is NO WAY that he could’ve jumped my privacy fence in his state!

The judge reviewed the information and demanded that they return the baby back to my custody. The judge stated that he could not make them give the other children back because there still was an open case. DHS stated they felt that the baby was in danger as well. The judge asked if they had any proof of such endangerment, if the baby was malnourished or abused, DHS states there were no such findings. The judge AGAIN demanded that they return the baby back to me. He ( the judge) then turned to me and stated that DHS will try and find a judge to overturn his ruling so be prepared and wished me luck. 

On October 18,2006 (a Couple of weeks after the court hearing), I moved to a bigger house and my children were separated and put into Foster care. My oldest son was placed by himself, my six and seven year old were placed together with a couple and my four year old daughter was placed with the baby. On the evening October 19th, DHS showed up to my new home with the police AGAIN. This time, they arrested me for a traffic ticket that I thought I paid off in 2002 and took my baby once again. I got out the next day and called my court appointed attorney to set up visitation with my children.

I was allowed one hour, supervised with them. My Oldest son wasn’t able to come and they wouldn’t tell me why. I later found out that they had admitted him to ANOTHER behavioral hospital. My six year old daughter had scratches on her face and a black eye. Her and my 7 year old son were filthy and smelled. My son told me that the little boy that he shared a room with tried to “hump” him and he had to fight him off. He said that he was scared to go to sleep. He told the foster couple and they wouldn’t do anything about it. They both stated that the foster couple would hurt them and spank them when they misbehaved. 

State law says that foster parents are NOT to use Corporal punishment on foster children. State law also says that when a child has been sexually molested and is in State custody, he/she is required to have their OWN room. 

When my kids were telling me about their foster home, they kept looking over to the foster parent, which was looking at them. My son said he was scared and that he knew they would get in trouble when they got back to the foster home for telling. My 4 year old and baby were okay at the time. I brought up my concerns to the worker and she said she would look into it. I got a letter from my 6 and year old foster mom and she said that my daughters’ black eye and scratches came from her wrestling with their dog. I’ve never known for a dog, no matter HOW big, to black a kids eye! She tried to assure me that my children were NOT being abused and that they were being well taken care of. The worker never investigated my concerns.

The foster mom who had my two youngest children decided to relax my 4year old's hair without my consent. State law says that a foster parent CANNOT alter a child in anyway with first having the parents permission to do so. My daughter has a congenital heart defect and there is no way of knowing that the chemicals applied to her head could’ve had some type of affect on her. After voicing my complaint about the relaxer to the worker, the foster mom said that I was causing her grief and she no longer wanted my daughter but she would keep the baby. 

DHS placed her with another foster mom who failed to take her to her Cardiac appointments. 

My oldest son told me on several occasions, that the orderlies at the hospital manhandled him and left bruises and scratches on him. We filed a grievance with the hospital and I informed the worker what my son told me. Nothing was ever done, they stated that he was lying, even though both my mother and myself saw the bruises and scratches on him during our visits.

After all of this, I had it. My mother and I started emailing the Governor, the Mayor, State Senate, and DHS in our capital Oklahoma City. We contacted the Media as well. As far as the politicians were concerned, they kept passing the situation off to other departments stating that they don’t handle affairs with Child Welfare. We emailed the head of Department of Human Services Bob Plank, who basically told us to stop calling and emailing him, that he couldn’t do anything either. I decided that I would file a lawsuit against the State, but I couldn’t find any attorney to take the case. The Media (newspaper and television) stated that they couldn’t run the story because they couldn’t get involved. No one would listen or help me.

I informed my worker of my intent to file a lawsuit. Sixty days after my children were removed from my care, we went to court again for a review. Before we could get in front of the judge, the DHS worker and Assistant DA said they would give me my kids back as long as my Ex would state that he was in the home that day they were removed. He knew that this was taking a serious toll on me, so he agreed and said that he would return back to his home town in New Jersey. My worker asked me if they give me my kids back, will I drop the suit, I didn’t answer. 

I got my kids back one by one. My oldest came home last three days before Christmas. I was to get him into some Outpatient therapy and keep him on all FOUR medications that they put him on while Inpatient. We kept up with the appointments with the therapist until his appointment conflicted with the review court hearing. I called to reschedule his appointment, but instead, they cancelled it. They in turn closed his case as an outpatient patient. I informed my worker of this and she said it was okay. At the review, the judge stated that as long as I continued to comply and that my Ex stayed away, they would close my case in June 2007.

When I got my kids back, I called my daughters’ cardiologist and she stated that they were worried about her because she hadn’t been to any of her appointments. She stated that they needed to see her immediately. She had to have a procedure called Balloon Angioplasty (where they take a balloon catheter and go through her femoral artery in her groin so they can blow the balloon and push the scar tissue from the open heart surgery that she had when she was four days old) to widen her main artery. 

In April, this was done, but the Cardiologist who performed the procedure stated that he couldn’t get the catheter let alone the balloon in her artery because it was too narrow, they would have to perform a SECOND open heart surgery on her and use artificial material to widen her artery plus use artificial material to widen the valve on the right side of her heart. 

They stated that if she was brought in earlier that this could’ve have been caught and the right side of her heart wouldn’t be as weak as it was. Her heart was performing at 30% capacity when it should be performing at least 70%! She is 5years old!! 

ON May 31, 2007, my five year old had to have her SECOND open heart surgery.

June came and case was closed, but three days before it actually closed, DHS decided that they would put CHBS (a program that comes to your home to make sure you comply with what DHS has requested you do). I agreed even though my case was closing in three days. The CHBS worker came out once a week and visited with me and the kids. This went on months AFTER my case was closed. 

On November 2, 2007 my now 7 year old daughter went to school and stated that my eldest son scared her and my now 5 year old on Halloween by chasing them with a knife and supposedly urinating on them. The school called DHS again and they came to investigate. 

They refused to let the daycare provider pick them up from school, so I had to leave work (which I already had one foot out the door to be terminated and couldn’t afford to leave due to having to miss for all of the other court hearings and school issues for my boys) to see what was going on.

The investigator asked me questions about my children and how things were at home. I cooperated and they let me take my girls home with me. My lawn man was cutting my yard for the last time of the season and I had forgotten to get some cash to pay him. So I left for the gas station to go to the ATM to get some cash. When I pulled into my driveway, I saw the DHS investigator along with five police cars pull in behind me. She gets out of her car and states that she has verbal permission from a judge to take my kids because now my OLDEST son is supposedly abusing the children. 

My kids had just come outside to greet me and saw the police cars. They became hysterical. My oldest son went back into the house, or so we thought. They gathered my children again and placed them into police cars. They asked where my oldest went and I said he went into the house. They went in and tore my house apart looking for him. They came out saying he wasn’t in there. He had snuck out the back door and ran away. The police didn’t even look for him. While all this was happening, the CHBS worker had pulled up for our weekly session.

They left with the four younger children to take them to the emergency shelter. My son later called me and told me that he had ran away and that he wasn’t going back to the shelter because they were just going to put him back into the hospital. I begged him to tell me where he was and he finally did. My daycare provider had come over for support when they took my kids. She went to pick up my son. The CHBS worker stated that we needed to turn my son in to DHS and reluctantly I did so.

Five days later, my uncle, who happens to work at the shelter that my children were in said that he wasn’t going to leave my kids there for another day. He told his supervisor that he wanted to take my kids home with him but she said he couldn’t because DHS was returning the kids home. The worker never called me to even make this known to me. We had just gone to court the day before and the judge deemed my children deprived based on what DHS stated. They said that I left my children home by themselves at all hours of the night and that I had all kinds of people (mostly men) in and out of my home. 

Just to sidetrack a moment, I work 9-5:30p Monday through Friday for a major Insurance firm which closes at 10pm CST. I never work past my schedule because my children are involved in too many extracurricular activities and my oldest son has night school on Mondays. Even if I had to make up hours for appointments, I had my neighbor, niece, nephew, or cousin stay with my children while I worked one to two hours over. 

I never invited anyone over to my home, especially men, because I was cautious about whom I let around my children. The only people that ever visited were family and my 17 year old neighbor who had a crush on my niece. I wasn’t and still am not dating because I’m afraid DHS will have some OTHER excuse to take my children.

I called the DHS investigator and asked her what was going on. She told me that they were going to give my kids back that day (November 7, 2007) but I had to meet with her first. I left work early again so I could get my children. The investigator said that I would have to voluntarily seek family and individual counseling for myself and children, take some more parenting classes and continue with CHBS. I agreed under the assumption that, like the last time, DHS would pay for the classes. 

I asked Family and Children Services and the CHBS worker to help me locate a therapist that had either weekend hours or evening hours and came to my home for counseling. The CHBS worker stated that I would have to pay for the classes which were six and eight weeks long, $15 /week, plus buy the book, pay for additional daycare, and travel to the other side of town. 

I explained to her that I couldn’t afford to pay for the classes plus daycare and books, that I would need some type of financial assistance otherwise I couldn’t do it. She stated that there was a scholarship that would help pay for the classes but there would still be some out of pocket expense plus I would still have to pay for the additional childcare and the books. I told her that there was no way I would be able to afford additional childcare and gas on my budget. I told her since it was voluntary, if they were not going to help, I couldn’t take the classes. I live from check to check and have no room for additional expenses and I tried to explain that to the CHBS worker. I receive no help from the fathers (yes FATHERS ) of my children and my income is the only thing coming in.

On December 3rd, my 8 year old son had an altercation at school and picked up a pair of scissors then laid them back down. (I admit my son has a very big anger issue and has been to counseling for it ) He had to be restrained to calm down. The school called resource officer (Tulsa police officer who deals with children at school) to come out and talk with him. The officer was familiar with my son as well as my family (she used to go to church with my mother). The principal called me at work and said that I needed to come and get my son because of the scissors. 

I left on my lunch break (which is 30mins) to pick him up from school. When I got there I told the officer that I couldn’t stay, that I needed to get back to work. She said “he cannot come back until he receives some help”. I said OK, but I really have to go. She stated that the principal may need to talk with me. I told her that she can call me on my cell phone and we could discuss what happened but I REALLY needed to leave, because if I returned late to work, I would lose my job. She shook her head and another teacher handed me his coat and we left. I didn’t receive a call on my way back to work. 

My son stayed with me at work until I had another break to take him to my Uncle’s house that lived not too far from my job. I returned back to work. Twenty minutes before I was to get off, my oldest son called and said that the Police and DHS were at the house. I told him to open the door and hand the officer the phone. It was the same officer from the school. I asked her what was this about and she said that I had to talk to DHS. 

I work in a call center and was on a live phone when my son called me. The only reason I answered the phone is because he kept calling back to back, otherwise I wouldn’t have answered. While on the phone with the officer, I got a call on my work phone and I told her that I had to go and disconnected the call. About 10 minutes later, my niece called and said that the police and DHS was over to her house looking for me, even though I told them I was at work earlier. I didn’t hear from either the police or DHS the rest of the evening.

After work, I picked my children up from daycare and my son from my Uncle’s and went home. My oldest son said the heater wouldn’t come on so we got some clothes and went to a hotel for the night. 

I was off the next day and overslept, so my girls didn’t go to school. My daycare provider called me and said that DHS and the police came to her home and searched it looking for me and my children. I later found out that they came to my job as well looking for me but as I said I was off that day. She told me that they had put an all points bulletin for me and my children and that we were running. They said that if I didn’t turn in my children that they would have me arrested and my parental rights taken away. She gave me the number of the investigator (which was the same person from November 2nd). I called her to ask her what this was about and she demanded that I turn my kids over to her. 

I asked her why and she stated because I refused to get my son a psychiatric evaluation. I tried to tell her I didn’t know that I was supposed to have him evaluated, but she started yelling at me and told me that she wasn’t interested in what I had to say and she just wanted my kids. I told her to refrain from the yelling that I was an adult and deserved to be treated as such.  She yelled she can talk to me however she wanted, just give her my kids. So I hung up. I went to my attorney’s office to find out what I could do about this and he said I had to turn over my children. I went to my car and called DHS to speak to her supervisor. She wasn’t available so I asked to speak with HER supervisor. 

Once she was on the phone, I gave her a rundown of what took place and told her I would bring my children in but I WOULD NOT give them to that investigator because I don’t trust her. She said she would have another worker call me and set up a time so they could get my kids. 

At first, they wanted to meet me at my home with the police, I asked why did the police have to be involved and she stated because of the ‘incident’ that happened earlier. I asked what incident and she wouldn’t answer me. I spoke to the Supervisor again and I asked her why the police had to be involved and she said the same thing, because of the earlier incident, which she couldn’t tell me what it was either.  

We agreed that I would bring them to their office the next day but security had to be present. I explained to my kids what was going on and they were upset. I consoled them as best I could. 

The next day we arrived at the DHS office and the acting supervisor came out to greet us. They put my children in one room and we went to another to discuss what had happened. I explained to her my side of the story and requested that another investigator handle this case because I felt the previous one was biased. They tried to tell me that I didn’t have that right to ask for another investigator. I kindly corrected them and stated I do have that right according to my attorney. She tried to tell me that this would benefit me to have the same worker on the case. I told her it wouldn’t especially if she had my children removed before. While telling the supervisor this, the police enter the room and the same investigator was in the hall. I told them I will let my kids go with them but not with that woman. She handed me a petition stating that I had abandoned, abused, and neglected my children and I was to appear in court Monday December 10th.

They took my children and detained me as they did so. I was late for work and my supervisor said that I may be terminated due the attendance issues but she wasn’t for sure yet and she would let me know. I found out that afternoon, that they had took both my boys and placed them in a behavioral hospital! 

Today, we went to court and DHS didn’t show and hadn’t turned in a report for the accusations. The judge passed it until December 14th, to give them time to get their information in order. In the meantime, my children are not to have contact with me and are to remain in the shelter and the hospital.

I know that this was a lot to read, but I wanted you to know from the beginning. 

As I said, I have tried to get my story heard through the local media and they will not take my story. I know that the first time they took my children was legitimate and I learned from my mistakes. But the last three times were just uncalled for. I don’t feel that the State should be able to just take kids with out just cause. I know that there really ARE children who need to be rescued from their parents, but not mine. I work hard and take good care of my children, I do not feel that the reasons they keep uprooting my kids are good enough reasons. 

Since they first time they took my kids, they have had problems sleeping and their behaviors have gotten worse, especially my boys. I have to continually take off from work to go to their schools and they have been suspended on numerous occasions. Every time they take them, the worse off they get. I have tried putting them in counseling, but it doesn’t help. 

I think DHS needs to stop harassing decent people and concentrate on the ones that really need intervention. In Oklahoma, DHS is like the Mob, everyone is scared of them, including the Government. The juvenile court system is a joke. 

During the preliminary hearing, parents aren’t allowed to say anything, the judge reads the report that the DHS investigator writes and make his decision based on that information alone. That isn’t right. There are always two sides to every story and the courts don’t take in consideration what the parents have to say. In fact, they don’t even acknowledge that you are there!

I could go on and on about my issues with DHS and give you more details than what I already have (like how they told my 4 year old they wasn’t giving her back to me that they were putting her up for adoption). This mob needs to be stopped and improved. They are breaking up entirely too many good homes and ruining too many children.

Please help me in my struggle. Please consider airing my story. 

If you would like more information or have any questions, please contact me by email at tameka_ds@hotmail.com, or by phone 918-694-6581. 

Thank you, 

Tameka D. Shaw